Japanese Couple at Odds Because of Cat Hair and Cats Generally Being Mother Fuckers
The Yomiuri ShimbunDear Troubleshooter:
I’m a housewife in my 40s living with my two sons. I’m annoyed with my husband, who lives away from home because of work, over his lack of understanding toward my two cats. Whenever he comes home on weekends, we get into fights because he complains about my cats. He said he can’t stand them shedding all over the bedding, and grumbles that the hairs stick to his clothes whenever he lies down.
I’m always telling him to use tape to get rid of the hair, but he hisses there must be mites in the fur and that I should keep the house clean for the sake of our children’s health. I clean whenever I can, but once a week or so is all I can manage — never mind trying to do it every day.
To begin with, I can’t stand how he whinges on and on about the cat hair.
He says sarcastic things like “Oh, my throat feels off these days. Must be those cat hairs.”
Isn’t there a way to get him to accept my pets?
J, Tokyo
J from Tokyo needs to grow up. If you read this story and side with the wife, I will never understand you. There are people who love cats and people who dont. The difference is that people who love cats can live without a cat and be fine. If you really hate cats, it’s tough to live with those bastards.
The meowing of a domestic house cat is one of the worst noises in the world to a certified cat hater. Cats meow at the most inopportune time and scratch everything to hell. If you hate cats, living with one is impossible let alone living with two of those fuckers. But, there is no rationalizing with a cat lover on this issue even if you come at the issue as calmly as possible. The cat lover isnt having it.
I love monkeys. Love em. Like four of the electives I took in college were about primates and gorillas. I laugh every single time I see a orangutan waive on tv. Look at this little fella in the video below. So damn cute but she cant live with me because I respect my wife’s boundaries despite the fact that monkeys and gorillas give me pure and unadulterated joy.
My wife doesnt like monkeys because they are prone to slinging shit around the house which is problematic for people who dont like shit slung around the house, and I get that, so no monkeys for us.
Cat lovers cant do that. They cant be rational. J in Tokyo forces her husband to not only have one cat but two cats. Hair everywhere. Possibly mites. Just the thought of having shitty cats that are riddled with mites flying up and down the stairs with no regard to wood flooring or the furniture is maddening. There’s no way for me to know for sure but I believe him that his throat is itchy. And of course he whinges on and on about the cat hair. Why wouldn’t he? It’s the cause of his itchy throat.
Don’t let them paint the husband as the bad guy here. The guy loves his wife so much that he doesnt have the heart to even mention the fact that his house smells like rancid piss at all times. Cat havers always think their houses don’t smell like piss, but they do. I have a cat at my house and I’m certain that my house reeks of piss and it has nothing to do with the fact that I exclusively pee in the sink when I’ve been drinking. Cat piss stench deep in the walls at the McNealy House. Gonna destroy the home value.
Her final question was “isnt there a way to get him to accept my pets?” No. No, there is not.